Pronoun Police and Privilege

Oh hello. It's been a while.
On 27th December I posted the following on social media;

2017 was the year that queer labelling and gender fluid binary madness took hold. Middle class millennials who've rarely known struggle found a cause to be upset by, gender fluidity and pronouns. Particularly the rise of 'they'.
For the record, I identify as pansexual, queer and non binary. My ovaries have never functioned properly and I have high levels of testosterone (explains a lot really). But I couldn't give a rats twat about being misgendered because in the grand scheme of things, it's insignificant.
Insisting on gender neutral pronouns is pretentious. It's elitist to expect people unschooled in queer academia to use it. Do you and live your true authentic self etc but I really can't be arsed using 'they' while numerous queer siblings the world over are actually suffering for being who they are while you howl demands from your first world soapbox.
Yes call out bigotry where the intention is hateful but perhaps stop being offended by every tiny infraction? Save that anger for real injustices and harness that energy for the greater good.
Two great bastions of British comedy recently nodded to queer labeling. The League of Gentlemen with Babs' ACRONYM and French and Saunders with LGBLT. I approve. Both subtly takes the piss while being respectful and if we can't laugh at ourselves, well we're all fucked.
Lewis Hamilton is a choad.

I received a lot of support publicly and privately from queer people, transgender people, straight people, those unable to post publicly due to their position and a mother of trans children. I also received the wrath of the terminally offended.

My intention was not and will never be to deny trans or non binary folk the right to exist. I'm their biggest cheerleader especially regarding visibility. I've been called 'Satan', 'offensive', 'hateful' 'old' (true), 'will die soon' 'grumpy' (guilty), 'fucking disgusting', a 'bitch' (yep), 'rude', 'bigoted' and a 'Daily Mail fascist' amongst other things in the last few days. I've also been accused of transphobia. Yes I'm old, I come from a generation where many trans, non gender conforming and queer people have and had thicker skins. Incredible angels and warriors who lived they're true selves long before queer academia, social media and terminology like 'non bianry' existed. They deserve so much respect and get all of mine.
I've not spoken about this publicly before but last year I walked away from a regular well paid gig as the management wouldn't change their policy regarding transgender people. In my kink life, I run a pansexual monthly event for those outside the heteronorm. A safe space for trans and non binary folk, many who don't have the luxury of social cliques to be themselves. So don't wave around transphobe like a wilted lettuce when you know sweet F.A. about me.

Those who know me in real life know my intentions, however sarcastic or bitchy, are never hateful. I don't hate anyone. Except bigots, those who commit unconsensual acts, Trump and James Corden. Yes I'll admit I was snarky about privileged, moral puritans. I guess I was and am tired of many of them rounding up on people who oppose their views. Funny how those same people can't even look you in the eye in person but happily bash you online. I know numerous fierce, smart and opinionated people tell me in private they feel they can't say anything online these days for fear of the Wrath of Woke. Truly interesting people are being gagged for having a sense of humour or voicing opposing thought. That's pretty crap.

Regarding pronouns, I didn't mean the 'I can't be arsed' bit. I'll call you what you whatever you want babe. Yes I find it precocious but if it helps an individual feel groovy, cool but your  identity is so much more than a word. And there are far bigger fights to be fought.
Everyday I'm incredibly grateful for who I am; a loud, opinionated, queer, kinky, ridiculous person who has performed all over the world in a wig and just happens to have a vagina. There are millions who don't have that same privilege.
LGBTQ+ people have come a long way, particularly in the west but homophobic and transphobic hate crimes are still on the rise. Outside our safe spaces and queer bubbles there are a lot of people in the world who still loathe us. Every single human that doesn't conform to heteronormativity or gender constructs deserves the freedoms we have in the first world. But rather than work together to combat this, we're too busy bickering among ourselves over words. And words can only harm when the intention is hateful.

There are clubs and venues I'll probably never work for again after this but hey ho. I've fought bigger battles and still here.
Thank you to those who publicly defended me and could see my intentions aren't evil. It's tough these days huh?!
I'm sorry if I offended with my gregarious sarcasm. I'm not sorry to those who think it's cute to bully anyone who opposes their opinion.


There's a current UK TV ad for vodka featuring fabulous queer people. The strap line being “Labels are for bottles, not people”. Yep.

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